News and Gossip

by

Doctor Gadwall

Prince Harry in & Out of Afganistan

Ringing

One birder emailed to say about his Sunday birding 'Cold day at Clara Vale, iced pond, and a bloody Bird Ringer for the second weekend on the trot, theres hardly a bird at Clara without a ring, but he says theres something wrong with the Blue Tit population, apparently their dying too young, so he has to concentrate on them'..

Who ordered the Nan?

The same Sunday the Bishop was checking the white-winged Gulls at Stella when a more common Herring Gull flew over his holyness carrying something large, which it then released. The bird's aim was slightly out, as it missed the hallowed head by inches and the half-eaten, soggy nan bread splattered against his car roof.

HEN HARRIER

As you area probably aware, it started as a quiet evening watching two of England's rarest birds of prey wheeling in the air over Dersingham nature reserve in Norfolk. The reserve's warden and two visitors gazed in admiration as the Hen Harriers circled slowly. Then came the muffled blast of a shotgun and the first bird fell from view. Then another shot, and the second bird plummeted down. The shots came from the Queen's estate bordering the reserve at Sandringham, and the warden immediately raised the alarm. Norfolk police found themselves investigating the illegal killing of two protected birds of prey by someone on the royal family's land.

The facts
Two hen harriers dead
One prince questioned
No charges
Police not seeking anyone else over killings.

The Questions
Did Prince Harry do it?
Did Prince Philip orchestrate it?
Should the RSPB remove the Royal from their name in protest?
What's a reserve warden doing watching birds?

If you want, you can write to your local MP raising your concerns and ask what the government is doing about the protection of our natural heritage and in particular raptor persecution - bearing in mind that funding for Operation Artemis ends this year and Police Wildlife Liaison Officers are being retasked.

Hello Doctor Gadwall.

i have created a petition about the persecution of the sawbill family. it is a truly dreadful thing to do and seeing you as a birding figure i look up to i thought that you could sign this petition and maybe the sawbill family will be a common occurance on the gateshead birders website after people have seen it.

please please please sign it

matthew hall (13 years old).

http://petitions.pm.gov.uk/longlivesawbills/

http://petitions.pm.gov.uk/longlivesawbills/

Today about 17.00pm spotted for the first time a Grey Squirrel in my street Meadow Rise on the bottom of estate next to the QE Hospital on the old Dykes path. It looks like it must have been in the house gardens it headed towards the trees at Beacon Lough next to the blocks of flats. Wildlife has defiantly rediscovered their former habitats who would have thought this 30 years ago when pollution and waste was the norm Brilliant

Bob Potts

I was at Clara the other day and the pond does need a clean out, as its nearly fully clogged up with weed went to Far Pasture and saw the new approach to the hide, much better than getting my boots clogged up with 5lbs of mud on each boot.

[by email ... Name supplied]

I am just a casual reporter to the site but do have it on my favourites and look every day. If I do happen to see anything of interest I will continue to let you know . Following on from this I can tell you that I nearly crashed the car a few minutes ago ( at 16.35 ). I was coming up the aA695 between Blaydon and Stargate when a red kite appeared from the quarry at car roof height, flew straight at my car and swept upwards very nearly colliding !! It then turned and flew alongside the car, again at roof height before flying back across the quarry, giving marvellous close up views.It did have a wing tag but I didnt have a chance to see what colour/number. If I didnt know better you would swear that it was showing off. It occurred to me afterwards that it would have looked fantastic on an insurance claim form !!

Karl

If some people complain at chainsaw girls activity at Shibdon they should see what a group of 4 blokes with a chainsaw & chipper can do at Clara Vale. The new meadow will be superb.

[Britney Barndoors (Miss )]

Far Pasture Open Day

A regular went to Far Pasture on Sunday, didnt realise that there was an open day on but there were quite a few people there and i must congratulate the patience of the "helpers" in pointing out the hidden snipe to the newcomers!!! Although the one that SWAM? across the pond was quite easy to spot! Well done.

Tea-bag search produces views of Tawny Owl

One of our observers saw a Tawny Owl in Rowlands Gill at the end of August. "We've heard them here for years", he said "but last night was our first sighting when one was disturbed by the spotlight beam of the police helicopter which was sweeping the road last night!". This was in support of the dog team which happened to be searching the area at the time. What the hell was going on round here last night.

The Proprietor of McClay Models and The Triple Cheese Pizza Emporium fame happened to be visiting the valley the same day. But the police refuse to comment on that the two things are linked. They also deny they were assisting in locating the tea-bag he used to use when he was warden at Thornley.

OK down at the Corral

With rumours going on that there was a lot of Senior Warden pointing going on down at Shibdon, the Doc despatched one of his deputies to investigate. He reported back that they appear to be building a corral for Water Buffalo in the reserve. What is going on?

Have you ever ....

... seen the Bishop and that mysterious warden of the valley Everhurt Frosted together? No, I thought not. Last year they both disappeared at the same time and were both claiming they were holidaying in Austria. Ask them where they have been this year when they both again disappeared at the same time and they both will say Italy. Too much of a coincidence for my liking. I think it's mighty strange, don't you?

And talking of strange and Everhurt, have you managed to get through the door at Swalwell visitor centre recently without tripping over some wood? You have probably noticed the place is stowed out with routed signs. There's more wood in the centre than there is in many of Gateshead's reserves. What are they going to do with all those signs? Is there anything in the valley that will not end up with a label. As a cautionary measure it may be advisable not to stand still in the Country Park to prevent the Lady of the valley putting a sign on you too. But with thousands of signs currently available maybe thats the idea.

Don't Worry he's all right

Several of you may have heard about the accident involving a large warden, a mad dog and a guinea pig. I can put all your fears at rest and inform you that the guinea pig is all right. Oh, and the warden is laid up with a torn calf muscle.

What was that screaming blur that just went past?

The Doc had several emails asking about a terrifying scream along the Derwent Walk the other day and others about Olympic sprint training happening there. Well I can exclusively reveal that the two reports are not only related but are in fact the result of the same incident.
If you have been past the Clockburn Lake in the valley recently you will notice that Mr. & Mrs. Swan have taken up residence and are in the process of nesting. As I am sure you are aware they can get a little short-tempered during this stage of their breeding cycle and this behaviour was mentioned to our senior warden there. To show them who was boss he went down to the water's edge, though I'm not sure why, to chastise them perhaps? Anyway Mr. Swan was not impressed by this masculine behaviour and obviously wanted to show he was the chief cob. So he arched his wings and hissed and pattered over to see our brave warden. However our warden decided he was not brave after all and ran up the bank screaming, a petrifying sound that could be heard miles away.

Recent Report

A regular at Shibdon Pond has just reported - rare species spotted yesterday. I believe there were 8 warden’s in one skein ?????.

I think the collective term for a group of wardens is 'a Mirage'. Unless you believe in Miracles.

Red Kite lunches

You may have read about the Grey Squirrel culling at Chopwell on the Animals page. Well, we have since been asked - if that has anything to do with the number of grey squirrel corpses scattered around the fields at Barlow last week?

Doc sells out ? - No he hasn't but ....

On his last few visits he has noticed all the expensive camera equipment in the hide at Clara Vale and it's obvious there is a more afflunet visitor to this reserve these days. So, when dipping on the Kingfishers can he recommend the following fine wine to quaff with your salt cod fritters and wild herb salad.

At Gibside, the strangest sight of the day was when the observer leaning on a farm gate, felt a thud on the gate and looked down to see a panicky rabbit pass under it, followed by a bedraggled looking stoat. A typical zig-zag chase ensued but it was more like a slow trot rather than the usual super fast show of sleek efficient predator and running on fear prey. In fact, the stoat especially, looked
knackered. They came back through the fence and headed away up the road, the uphill part seemed too much for the stoat and it stopped, then so did the rabbit just a matter of feet ahead of it. Then the
stoat began to run again but the rabbit ran off quickly from a standing start and the stoat gave up, slinking off into the undergrowth after a couple of indecisive 'should I or shouldn't I' moves. A very strange scene, they either must have been running for miles and were knackered or the stoat
was a bit under the weather and the rabbit was just taking the p**s.
Whatever, it made his day.

COLLARED DOVES

An interesting note from Whickam of a pair of Collared Doves breeding in a garden.
2nd June - Collared Doves built nest in the garden at about 8 feet from the ground
3rd June - eggs laid
17th June - eggs hatched 14 days later.
4th July - two birds fledged

but the interesting part is since 4th June both chicks and two parents have roosted in the same tree as the nest about 10-12 feet from the ground .

HOOPOES

The third report of Hoopoe in as many days was - Two Hoopoes flew over me tonight over Burdon Plain, about half a mile apart." They were roughly on a course from Causey Arch to Kibblesworth. Didn't really recognise them from underneath, they were much smaller than I'd imagined, but the cries were spooky and unmistakeable! It wasn't a nice "happy" hoop hoop sound like on the rspb site, it was a little quicker and sounded really forlorn, like the curlew cry sounds forlorn. Does that make sense? The nearest thing I've heard to what it was like last night was a sound effect on a pinball game!. (space cadet pinball in the windows games section - the warbling noise when the ball gets between the flippers and ends your turn) Although I didn't see the crests from underneath the wings were also distinctive, and I got a nice view of both of their beaks. Both were fairly low and flying straight and slow. My camera was at home, which was galling as I probably could have got 3-4 good pictures in the time they were overhead. I estimated their size at about halfway between blackbird and racing pigeon, but I'd always imagined they were about rook size so I thought these might have been youngsters. When I got home and found that I'd had the wrong idea about their size all my life. The bird life is really hectic along the path near the old mine, and there were stacks of wheatear in one of the fields and sitting on fence posts. They did go into Gateshead. They were on the path from St Andrews Station on Marley Hill
Railway to Birklands cottages over the field with the Exmoor ponies put in by Gateshead Council to recreate the moor at NZ 213 571. The kites are over there a fair bit too and it is a good place to see hares.

Wildlife Crime?

Have you seen the Dodgy Bird Club announcement of a forth-coming event? Ever since that infamous person from the Sunniside 400 Club infiltrated this establishment things have gone from bad to worse - they are now promoting a "Storm Petrel Barbecue". At least its not Leach's Petrels that are getting a roasting.

Mike? ... are you reading this?

Ann

Prey item of the smaller birds of prey

The Doctor received a nice e-mail from a lady saying one of her full-grown cats has disappeared and did I think that a Sparrowhawk had taken it. The Doctor responded my saying that sparrow-hawks rarely take anything apart from birds and would certainly not take an adult cat. She replied thanking the Doc and saying "I thought not and told my husband that it would have been that Kestrel that took him away" !!!!!

Nature Notes

By the Birtley Bishop

Saw my first Bee on Friday.

"What do you mean what sort? It was a bee.

Err, a Bumble Bee, yes thats what I mean, not one of those things that live in huts."

Yes, Honey Bee, it wasn't one of those. It was a bee.

I don't know what colour tail it had, it just looked like a *!£$(^@ Bee didn't it!.

Kelly's Lark

A report just in of a Skylark "singing in the rain", just singing in the rain, what a wonderful feeling, she's happy again.

.... thanks Britney

Photographic evidence that at least one record of Waxwing in Blaydon shopping centre was erroreous.

The Ticks for Cash Scandal

The Ticks for Cash inquiry into rarity corruption at the Dodgy Bird Club has started to look at a large number of claims. Professor Pochard, the former assistant to the Gatesheadbirders website until his sacking after a series of complaints, will be at the centre of this investigation said the spokesman and head of the inquiry, the right somethingorother the Birtley Bishop. The issue of illicit payments in rarity acceptance has returned to the spotlight after an undercover Doctor Gadwall investigation into bungs. The Ticks for Cash Scandal has highlighted a number of discrepencies and goes to the very top of rarity acceptance.
This undercover investigation alleges a rate card for rarities to be accepted is in existence and includes £30 for a Gateshead Rock Pipit and you can't afford a Siberian Rubythroat. Accidental secret footage taken at the last meeting of the rarities committee at a mysterious rendezvous near the coast last week was thought to exist but can no longer be found. "A number of cameras have been dropped and sent away for repair" was all a spokesman would comment.

WHAT THEY SAY:

"Now I know why I never got anything accepted "
Former Gateshead Senior Warden

"They can't take my ticks off me "
Chairman of the Sunniside 400 Club

"Sounds stringy to me Bishop, that's going to cost you a monkey "
Professor Pochard

"It has needed to all come out in the open - and that is not a problem. Whatever happens, we'll wait and see but for me it is not a problem. "
Portsmouth manager Harry Redknapp.

Bits & Pieces

The exhibition of red kite photographs has now moved to Leam Lane Community Centre in Felling. It will be there until the end of February.

The Dodgy Bird Club is again participating in a Long-eared Owl breeding Survey this year together with Cumbria & Teesmouth clubs.

If you are interested contact the Durham Bird Club via the local contact: Steve Evans Mobile 079 79 60 1231 (24/7) Home (0191) 512 6497

INFO FOR Long-eared Owl Survey 2007.
Introduction
The Long-eared Owl (Asio otus) is not only uncommon, but also the least well known of all British breeding owls. It is in the top 10 of UK birds for which we have little information on numbers. Derick Scott (The Long-eared Owl, 1997) gives a figure of 2000-4000 pairs but likely to be little more than 3000 pairs. He suggests that the population has declined by 50% since 1950 due to habitat destruction and loss. More recently, Birds in England (Brown and Grice 2005) estimate the population in England at 600-2000 pairs, noting that “there is good evidence that their range has contracted in many parts of England in recent decades”.

Its DBC description is “an uncommon but widespread resident and winter visitor”. There are now in excess of 50 known territories, whereas an estimate of the County population prior to the Survey was a mere 15 pairs. (Summer Atlas 2000)
January to August 2007
New Year 2007, will see the DBC project continue into its third year. The survey will span the first eight months of the year & will be split in two, as we aim to build up our knowledge base while following up on our previous success.
(1) Site Surveys (winter / spring) – Are a challenge between January & May, & will aim to provide us with new & additional info on breeding behaviour, display & nest site selection etc for known pairs. This will further increase our understanding of the birds requirements.

…. and if creeping around in the pitch black isn’t for you, then how about an evening stroll in the summer sunshine.….?

(2) Speculative Checks (summer) – Are easier, carried out on during summer evenings & will aim to fill in the gaps in the known distribution, confirm further breeding sites & go towards our goal of discovering the exact status of this species……

This Gateshead bird was photographed in 1984

Far Pasture Plea

A visit to Far Pasture proved to be a tad costly. Due to the fact that a rather large bus was ensconced in the middle of the car park, I had to reverse out of the gateway. The large rock is easy to spot but the two-foot high green gatepost fits rather nicely into one's blind spot. Result- a sickening crunch and what will no doubt be a decent sized repair bill. Can the offending post not be painted bright yellow and be heightened by a couple of feet so that it at least gives a fair chance of avoiding it? Judging by the red glass scattered around the base I am not the first to fall foul of this little trap.
My insurance company will not be amused.

Emeritus Eider

Its Curtains for Clara Vale

If you have been to the hide at Clara Vale LNR recently you will see that there is a curtain hanging down these days. Or... as one reader commented ... Someone has nailed a smelly cloth to the roof and it hangs down, weird!!!

The Doc went to see it for himself on Sunday and thought he had just entered Clara Vale Mini-theatre for the pantomine.

Ravenous Sparrowhawk

You may have seen the record for Tuesday 7th ...... Birtley Sewage Works - male Sparrowhawk seen to take a Starling, Linnet 30, Song Thrush 1, Pied Wagtail 21.

As one of our corresponents has noted - Dear Doctor, probably semantics but that sparrowhawk at Birtley sewage works must have been very hungry or just plain greedy to eat all those birds!!!!!!!!

Grey Lag "BVJ" Part II

More info on the Goose with the neck collar and radio transmitter - dated 27th October. See further down this column for the original sightings and history.

Thanks for the message about BVJ.  I visited Saltwell on Tuesday, and saw BVJ.  He seems to have paired with another greylag there.  My theory is that his mate thinks she's a Canada goose and drawn BVJ into their company!

The tag was, as you say, not on him.  I got a signal from the region of the island in the lake, so after talking to the park staff, I went back and managed to retrieve it on Thursday.  It was in about five feet of water just off the island where the boats are stored.

So that's the end of the line as far as BVJ's transmitting career is concerned, and at the moment, another bird in York having also dropped its tag, we have no tagged birds.  My colleage is attempting to catch near Ripon at the moment, and we'll be scouting a couple of sites in Northumberland again over the next couple of weeks.

We'll still be pleased to hear how BVJ is getting on though, particularly if he's seen at sites other than Saltwell.

Rose-coloured Starling - in 2002

A Rose-coloured Starling frequented a garden in Whickham earlier this year. Unfortunately the news was supressed. It was photographed and the record has been accepted by the Durham Bird Club

Look what you could have had

Grey Lag "BVJ"

We got the following reply on the goose that was at Shibdon (and Saltwell) with the neck collar and radio transmitter with another update on the 24th.

Yes, this is one of ours.

BVJ was caught and tagged at East Chevington nature reserve, in Druridge Bay on 9th May, together with BVH.  At the time, it was a second-year bird, but we weren't confident of a sex.

BVJ stayed around Druridge Bay until 5th June, when he moved north rapidly, leaving sometime around 8 - 10 am.  At 4pm, he was flying over the sea off Bamburgh; and he arrived around 6pm on Holy Island.  At 8pm the same evening, he settled briefly on the river near Norham, and at 10pm he was again stationary just south of Coldstream, further up the river.

6am the following morning saw him airborne over Hume, and the next signal is at 4pm the same day, stationary on the river at Denholm.  At 8pm the same evening, he was on a river north of Jedburgh.  At midnight, he was airborne, heading south over the Cheviots, and at 2am the following morning he was settled on the river bank in Coquetdale near Rothbury.  His next move was direct to Saltwell Park in Gateshead, where he arrived by 4am on 7th June.  And he's been there ever since - at least up until our last data download on Monday.

Presumably, he wasn't breeding (it would be unusual for greylags to breed at this age); having no goslings to raise, he was free to leave Druridge in June, and may have been seeking a suitable site at which to moult.  Evidently, he finally chose Saltwell Park, and has elected to stay there, probably for the free food.

Update - 24th August - According to the satellite data, with the last upload on Saturday, he seems to be moving between Shibdon, Saltwell and the river around Ryton Willows and Clara Vale, where he spent a while on a pasture field. We've found greylags are quite willing to fly at night if the weather's clear, and often do quite a bit of feeding at night.  It may be that he loafs during the day at Shibdon and sneaks off at night to feed elsewhere.

Shibdon Pond

Work in September cleared the ditches and lowered the water levels so much that a Water Rail was seen in the middle of the pond.

Digger working on the ditches

Results of the Kite-e-Vision Speech Contest

The Doctor is gutted. Like everyone else he was excitedly awaiting the results of the Kite-e-vision speech contest. And just like the Eurovision and those Greeks, French and Balkan States the PM awarded us with Nil points. Lord Ruddy Duck tried to claim 5 points with a sort of "could not have done it etc." but quite rightly, The wise Lady H would not allow it. The Doctor is currently contacting the RSPB demanding that the bash is declared null and void. If accepted there will be another contest which will be held at a Monday morning meeting at Thornley and points will be awarded for every word beginning with 'F' that the Pizza Delivery Boy utters. Get your calculators ready.

The Red Kite farewell bash game

There is a farewell bash for all the helpers and volunteers who helped with the Red Kite viewpoint at the viaduct during the summer. I'm sure all who attend will be thanked for their work during one of the PM's famous speechs. To while away the hours during these monologues the Doctor has invented a little game

Listen carefully to the speechs and every time you hear the following phrases award yourself the points

• Could not have done it without you ..... 5 points
• We engaged with xxx people .... 10 points
• Benefits to the local community ...... 10 points
• We did it for the schoolchildren ..... 10 points
• We hit all the targets ...... 15 points
• All our Stakeholders ..... 15 points
• Its as much about people as it is about Kites ..... 20 points
• I want people to think not of the Angel as a symbol of the North-East but our Kites ........20 points
• I've done enough talking ........100 points

First one to 500 points is the winner.

It was a female ...

The latest Doctor Gadwallballs was the other day when the ancient thing forgot the middle of the sentence in his haste to get the latest news out on a Holly Blue viz - Low Fell - A female visited a garden in Low Fell

Amongst the comments, The Emeritus Eider asked "Is a full description to be submitted? A shapely blonde perhaps; or maybe a voluptuous redhead? Either way, send her round." The Doctor is shocked

Ssssh ... its a secret

You probably have already heard and you will have seen it on the home page of this website but apparently the Red Kites fledging is supposed to be a secret until the PM announces it to the waiting masses via the World's Press. That is despite all of the members of public at the viewpoint and nearby watching it happen and the countless emails sent off subsequently to those concerned (and not concerned), even filling up the poor Doctor's mailbox.

Sunniside 400 Club Announcement

At an extraordinary committee meeting of the above last weekend it was decided that to reflect the changing habits of birders, particularly Professor Pochard , a new name is proposed for the Club. A spokesman for the organisation , The Right Horrible Bishop of Birtley announced that from now on the Club will be called The Sunniside Over-65 Club.

What does Britney look like?.

You have probably seen pictures of dogs dressed and groomed to look just like their owners. The same can happen with birders too. Here is a picture of a Britney-rung Great Tit. For those in the know - what an amazing similarity.

[Photo: Ray Wilby]

June News

The Doc apologies for the delays over the last few weeks as he was on holiday and then his computer had an off-day or seven. Professor Pochard did do his best in the meantime but due to a complaint from one of our readers we have had to fire the old anthya. We therefore welcome Lord Ruddy Duck on board who will assist the old Doc when times get tough in between his head-bobbing and other mating rituals.

Lamesley Reedbeds warning

The bishop was there on the afternoon on Sunday 14th May and parked at the entrance to the path running through the middle. Even though he only ventured half way up the track 2 large stones had been thrown at his car while he was away, one damaging the boot and the other smashing the rear window. A group of 6 youths had earlier been seen running though the reedbeds . Please be extra wary when parking at this site.

Clever Warblers

Britney sent a noted the other day on what was at Clara Vale. Amongst the summer visitors were 8 signing Blackcaps. So if you need your copy of Sylvia Warblers of Europe signed, there seems to be plenty of Blackcaps at Clara willing to autograph it.

Bradley Fell Updates - a sad end

I know many of you have enjoyed the monthly updates from one of our regular corresponents on Bradley Fell. However he has send me the following note.
Unfortunately the Bradley Fell March update will probably be the last. I can put up with the mindless vandalism and motorbikes - comes with the patch, but the amount of shooting over this area in recent months has completely p***ed me off and makes Barlow Fell seem like an oasis of peace. Late this afternoon the barrage of shot gun fire next to Jackies Plantation completely put me off walking along the public footpaths in that area with the dog and spooked a fair few birds several hundred yards away, including a pair of clearly panic stricken Kestrels, and I would have thought any early nesting birds in the woods/hedges nearer to the shooters wouldn't have even considered sitting tight and took off. Not the sort of place to enjoy watching birds and other wildlife.
I still have to venture down to the old workings bit and nearby fields to exercise the dog, so naturally if I see anything there worth reporting (or anywhere else in the Borough) I'll let you know.
Thanks for putting all the stuff I've reported from Bradley Fell on the website - I hope it has proved useful to anyone interested in the natural history of this area.

New Gateshead Insect expert

A certain ringer has started to diversify and managed to escape from his own mist nets to do a bit of entomology. He has reported in the last few days a Bumblebee species and a Wasp species. What a star, especially after he informed the Doc that it was a queen wasp - How did he know.... size? width of bands? No , apparently you can tell by " the effeminate way it flew & ponced around" or was that the ringer?.

Warden Training going well

Our new wardens are being well trained it seems. The excellent record of the Great-crested Grebe at Watergate in late March was found by our new Senior Warden at the site and subsequently suppressed until the following day when it was gone.

Don't panic, the Tsunami at Shibdon was a false alarm

Its OK folks, there is no cause for alarm. The Doctor was inundated by reports of a tidal wave at Shibdon the other day but after some investigative journalism at its best, the true story has emerged. A reliable source informs me that one of Thornleys own countryside rangers (nameless to avoid embarrassment but if you want a pizza delivered, he's your man) while strimming the vegetation at Shibdon Pond recently, promptly fell in taking his strimming equipment with him. So the recently reported Tsunami at the site wasn't part of the adverse weather conditions after all. Panic over.

Did you know ....

One of the largest Gadwall counts ever on the Isles of Scilly was made by our own Professor Pochard. What is even more surprising about this record count was that there were no Mallards present that day (.... apparently).

A sad day for Gateshead birding

If you think the decline Dodgy Bird Club had been stopped with the appearance of a monthly report - think again. If proof was needed that the Club is in real trouble here it is. It has co-opted a new member onto its rarities panel - none other than the Chairman of the Sunnside 400 Club, Professor Pochard. That duck-hating old duffer is smirking like a Bishop and rumour has it, thats its a ploy to get his hands on the Merganser Trophy for the biggest list this year. Apparently the only acceptable reports for Gateshead will be the ones that he sees. The Doctor does not believe these nasty rumours for one minute, even if he did start them, and knows the reason for joining was he was scandalously bribed with free coffee and biscuits.

More Hide problems

One local birder has commented - On a sad note, some swine has burnt the new hide door at Thornley, and smashed a window to get inside it. It sickens me to see such mindless destruction, I bet the people concerned don't do this to their own property.

A Fairy Tale

Doctor Gadwall has being doing his rounds and called in to see Britney and baby Pauletta last night. (She looks more like her father every day.) Poor Britney has not been birding as she is not getting much sleep due to little Pauletta keeping her awake at night. As he bounced Britney - I mean Pauletta - on his knee he talked fondly about the good old days of Durham Birding. 'Its like a wonderful Fairy Tale yet the characters seem so real' she said and before he knew it both mother and child were fast asleep. Britney said later 'that there must be many tired birders and there could be no better way of sending them to sleep than listening to the Old Docs tales of days gone by'. 'Why not tell your stories to everyone' she said. So the Doctor who does not need to be asked twice, agreed to tell the tales of the Holy Pond of Barmston in Never-Never-land, The evil King of Thornley Forest, the Dark Recorder, Sir Freddy of Dipperland, young Timmymills of Marsden, the Mighty White Suppression bird of the Moors and many more. So over the next few days or weeks or months (there could be no stopping him) the story of Durham Birding though the ages will unfold before your very eyes.

The Rise and Fall of the Dodgy Bird Club

or

STRINGALOT

........ a Doctors Tale

Chapter One

The Beginning

As the old twitching song goes .... In days of Olde when birders were bold, and pagers weren't invented....
A very long time ago when even the Doctor was but a small boy, birding in Durham was very different from now. News was relayed only by word of mouth at certain medeival meeting places such at the fabled East pond of Barmston, Birders did not venture out of their little birding sites (patches) and so it was rare to see another birder. It was safe to remain where you were - nobody could dispute any of your sightings if you told nobody. This practice is still carried out by a few Durham birders even today.
Outside the county it was a different matter entirely. To the north was the uncrossable river now called the Tyne, It was said that if a birder did cross it into the frozen north, the men of the Terrible Bird Club (TBC) would force you to join their clan and you would never birdwatch in Durham again. This whole area of Northumbria was ruled over by King Brian the Small and his henchmen The Gallowman and Ethel the Meek. Their castle was at a very private, guarded spot and you were strictly not allowed to visit as it was private or even look in at from the outside. Did I mention it was private? Birders were even scared to mention .... Hauxley Ringing Station!!!!! (cue music)
No record could get past the TBC no matter who claimed it. Oh, how things have changed. They even took your Durham records north of the river Wear off you. To the south the area around Teesmouth was held by the fierce Tees Marshes Bandits claiming the area as an independant county. Birders fought over this area for many years with blood being spilt, friendships broken and records lost. Lakeland to the west was a long way away and you had to cross the bleak wastes of the Durham Moors watched over by the mysterious invisible Rawlocks.
So it was better to stay where you were and bird alone or join a clan. The favoured spots had their own little groups with their own leaders such as Sir Timmymills of Marsden and his pet Hogmiester and Jimmy the Perf of Barmston, the King of Never-Neverland with its Holy East Pond of Barmston and the enchanted Peepy Plantation. Knowledge was not sought from books but from a wise old Oracle known as Grey Fred of Shields. Durham was a happy, settled place but things were about to change.

Chapter Two

Westie Hood and his merrie men (and women) of Thornley Forest

In the deep green forest of Thornley lived a very cheerful birder called Westie. What a cheerful chap he was, nobody knew for certain why he was always so happy but many had their suspicions. He was the leader of a band of wardens or his Merry Men (and Women) as he liked to call them. He birded day and night when he was young, always with that smile on his face. He was also a very, very lucky birder, always arriving just as the good bird was found or visiting a site for the first time in ages and finding that rare vagrant, much to the amazement of the regular watchers. During these adventures he went by his other name of 'Spawny Jack'. Queue sinister music .... There was however another birder in the forest at that time but he never smiled. He was a loner who found birds by himself and never told a soul. He did not want a bunch of Merry Men hanging around querying his sightings, he knew what he was looking at no matter what anyone else said. He also knew that one day he would be King of Stringalot!!!

Chapter Three

Never-Neverland

To the south of the great forests of Thornley was Never-Neverland. This area was very different from today where Barmston Pond is, with not a duck zoo or car-park in sight. Just two ponds an old railway-line, a wood and some scrub. But this was no ordinary place. One of theponds was magicical. The East pond had magnetic properties and birds, particularly wading birds, were drawn to its shores from all over the World. (I must remove these rose-tinted glasses). The wood known as it still is today was called Peepy Plantation. But way back then it was Enchanted. If you were part of the Never-Neverland birders all sorts of birds could be seen in this wood. More breeding species than any other wood in the county or even country it seemed.However if you were not one of the regulars you were lucky to spend all day in it and see more than a few Blackbirds and Great Tits. It was that sort of magical place.
Never-Neverland had its own leader called Jimmy the Perf and he had his own gang of birders. They usually spent all day there sitting in their little vans waiting for the next wader to be drawn in to the east pond. After only a few years the wader list here was the biggest for any inland pond in the whole country and only a couple behind Cley marshes. Jimmy the Perf was an exceptional birder and added many species to the Never-Neverland list that even now are still not on the British List.
During its peak a young boy started to watch here. Unlike now he was quite lucky and saw Spoonbill, Pectoral Sandpiper, Temminck's Stint, Broad-billed Sandpiper, Lesser Yellowlegs, Purple Gallinule, Common Crane, Red-throated Pipit, two Wilson's and one summer plumaged Grey Phalarope and many more. It is no longer that magical place, Jim the Perf is no more, his gang have disappeared but it still brings a tear to the Old Doc's eye. One day during those heady days a group of birders stood around talking by that very same magical pond. They chatted about forming a group for birders all over the county - a dodgy bird club - the idea of Stringalot was sown.

Chapter Four

Sir Timmymills of Marsden

Sir Timmymills is not all he seems. For a start he is a lot older than you would think. Plastic surgery is a wonderful thing these days. He is even older than the Chairman of the Sunnside 400 Club. A young Sir Timmymills was birding when Doctor Gadwall was but a mere duckling. His local area in those Olde Days was Marsden and if there was even a sniff of east or north in the wind he was to be found at Marsden, in some quarry, hall or South Tyneside marine promontory. He
managed to acquire his own little ensemble of birders including both a ferret-like young man who
would be sent in to the middle of a clump of bushes if there has even a suggestion there might
be something present and of course a pet Hogmeister. And if you thought the Old Doc was lucky in his Never-Neverland days it was absolutely nothing compared to the luck luck of Sir Timmy. If a rare bird was present it was a certainty that if you looked around he was there in the crowd or had already seen it, usually with his Hogmeister at his side.
In later years Sir Timmy got more adventurous and became a big twitcher and with his kind of luck got a list to match. He started going to foreign lands with his Hogmeister just behind him. Natives in the forests of places as far apart as Chile and Borneo would hear two distinctive calls. One would be 'How much?, Two quid for Bed and Breakfast, is there nothing cheaper' and the other, a deeper 'Arrrk, I saw it, it couldn't have been anything else ...Quarrk'.
As will later be revealed, Sir Timmy joined the birders of the oblong table (a wooden plank actually) at Stringalot and oversaw all the counties records, stringy or not. Nowadays, he has virtually retired and though he is still allergic to handing over money he is much more likely to be heard saying 'These smoked Salmon and cucumber sandwiches do taste better with the crusts cut off'.
The Hogmeister was given his freedom and is now running wild in the countryside of the north-east with his own gang of 'walking-dead'. If you want a glimpse of this remarkable beast, the best time is the 1st of January when by lunchtime he will desperately be looking for his 200th of the year. He can also be seen sporadically in October on the Isles of Scilly but usually he is in bed not feeling too well. Strangely however he recovers quickly when a rarity turns up. Once the Doctor nearly got trampled on by this creature who one minute was very ill indeed (his words) and the next was sprinting down the road taking no prisoners, when a rare pipt was found. A miraculous but not uncommon recovery indeed.
If you want a glimpse of Sir Timmy today, the best chance is, as it always was, Marsden with a touch of east in the wind. Like all rarities you need to look carefully. Listen for the diagnostic 'loose change' call and the odd glimpse of a picnic hamper.

Chapter Five

The Birtley Bishop - Part I - the Shibdon days

Considering how much the Birtley Bishop has graced these pages, what can be said of him that has not been said before? Quite a lot actually. For years he was Mr. Shibdon - he was not the Reverend then. He covered it every day, rain or shine. If something was claimed at Shibdon you could bet he had seen it, even if nobody else had. He worked the pond so much that even today his Shibdon list is far greater than anyone else’s, including all the current and former wardens, lucky, hairy and ugly ones included. Ask the Bishop if he has seen some bird or other in Gateshead, you can bet the reply will be he had one at Shibdon years ago. He even met his fiancé at Shibdon, admittedly several decades ago. After weighing up the pros and cons he announced his engagement. Well its handy as she lives just round the corner everybody but the Bishop said. The poor girl is still under the impression that it takes an hour and a half to drive from Birtley to Blaydon as she never realised that he always 'popped' into the pond first on his way to meet her.
Why he became a Bishop is not known for certain but it has been said that he once read that some members of the clergy could not marry and before you knew it he was announcing he was a Bishop. As the engagement presents turn to antiques it does not seem that the wedding bells will sound soon. It also means that together with the Old Doctor and the Chairman of the Sunniside 400 Club, those 3 birders plodding around Gateshead on a Sunday morning will continue to look much more likely to have come from 'Last of the Summer Wine' than 'Married with Children'.
Though famed for his identification knowledge and record description prowess, it must not be forgotten how long he watches a rare bird for or how skilful he is at pointing out the location of anything decent. His best three examples of this skill over the years have been.
1). When asked why he did not mention the Great Skua during a sea watch his reply was - 'Well it was difficult to pick up and you would not have seen it'.
2) 'You can't miss it, its flying in the sky, above the ground' ... 'Oh its gone'.
3).'Its in the green tree, next to the one with leaves on'.
However, what he is most famed for is his chuckling, usually because of someone else’s suffering. On one of their Last of the Summer Wine outings to Ross Back Sands, many years ago, they split up ... fatal. Both the Chairman and the Doctor went their own ways and the Bishop headed off in yet another direction. He saw Shorelark, Snow Bunting and Peregrine. In the very strong southerly wind the Doctor and Chairman saw nothing, and I mean nothing, at all. Imagine what it was like for those two as they headed back to the car. Walking mile after mile on soft sand heading directly into a gale force wind, having seen nothing and a Bishop behind constantly chuckling 'So you saw nowt then - ha ha ha'. Neither of them were ever the same again.
These days Shibdon is frequented much less by the Bishop and his long-suffering fiancé sees even less of him. He is however a major piece in the Chessmaster’s game and constantly forces him to move his white pieces away from that dangerous Black Bishop.

I can see for miles and miles and miles and miles and miles

As you may have noticed in the recent records, one of those chappies at Houghton sent me an email that a few of them were watching 4 Red Kites high over Birtley / Lamesley area including a pair displaying viewable from Rainton Meadows...... approx 7km away !!!! As well as this setting a bad precident - soon the Birtley Bishop will be claiming all sorts looking south-east from his bedroom window in between the adverts in Charmed and Buffy, it raises the question have you seen and identified the Kites from a further distance ... yet? and what will the record get to?

The Doctor has decided he must get a pair of those Leicahoughtonswarovskiezeiss 700 x 50s those Rainton lot are using.

A new email arrived later from one of the same observers who said he has recalculated the distance and there is a mistake. At last some sense in all this madness. - No chance - he says its closer to 10km. Help us all if they get into Gateshead from their Houghton exile. There's talk of them building a new seawatching hut .... on Ravensworth Fell!

This weeks wise rusings from the Birtley Bishop

Young Joseph Donkeyson wanted to see the Green Sandpipers at Lamesley and asked the Chairman of the Sunniside 400 Club for directions and off he went. After 2.5 hours poor Joseph gave up and later found out he was at the wrong place. He told the Bishop and said 'I mean, what sort of directions were those!!!!". "Good ones" said the Bishop chuckling his head off.

The Bishop was asked to describe the Lesser Scaup he saw at Teesmouth last weekend. "Its like a Tufted Duck but with more white on it" was the reply. And ... "Thats it really" said the Bishop. He is available to assist with anyone's rarities descriptions but thats NOT a recommendation.

The new hide at Far Pasture

Have your say

There have been a few comments about the new hide at Far Pasture.

One birder said - "Half the windows in the hide are still boarded up, and the new ones are rubbish, half the size of the originals, same crappy locks and latches and they don't all work".

In replay another birder has said "Some person has been moaning about Far Pasture in the log book and now has decided to vanderlise the outside door with similar remarks! My statment is the windows are now user friendly especially to the elderly who just couldnt open old windows. Yes Far Pastures has gone down hill a bit, but in a brief 20 mins visit today I still came away with 42 species of birds, so its a bit unfare for them to say theres nothing there except a swan. I say instead of moaning about it get of your backside and volunteer to do some work instead of other people doing it for you, its only right that the people look after what was made for them in the first place wouldnt you agree!"

The original reader has said - "Didn't intend to open a can of worms with my throwaway comment but as I did here is my official statement :)  My original comments were made shortly after the disappointment I experienced in visiting the site this week for the first time since mid-December when work started. I was surprised to see half the windows were still boarded up, and the new ones had the same locks as the old, (and at least one didn't work) after I had been informed at the Woodland Centre that the new windows would have similar locks to the new hide at the feeding station, a vast improvement safety-wise, and not everybody has keys to open the old ones (I know this because I often open windows for people who don't).The size issue isn't a problem as this will lessen the chances of being seen and disturbing the wildlife and as the previous correspondent says, makes the windows a lot easier to handle. But having said all that, I was at Thornley Centre today and it appears they are a mistake which has been taken up with the firm involved and so will be rectified shortly.- so not a problem really, just a matter of patience. hope thats cleared that one up, me and my gob!"

Dave Taylor said - Two wonderful moments at Far Pasture today. Firstly I watched an otter for about 15 minutes as it fished in the pond to the right of the hide. Although I didn't actually see it with a fish, it appeared to chewing plenty, presumably on small fish.  Secondly, the Robin which hangs around the car park was eating from my hand. Who needs to win the lottery when there are so many beautiful things out there for free? I would add that the Far Pasture hide is now not for the claustrophobic however.

'Gollum' the tame Robin at Far Pasture [Steven Fryer]

Steven has been training him for about a year now. "When I pull up he flys straight across and when I open my boot he jumps on the ledge wanting seed, if you drop some on floor he'll not fly on your hand so you've got to be careful

Birtley Bishop failure then delight

The man in a cassock is happy again now he is claiming to be on 80 for the year which includes just about everything in the borough. This is a marked change from the first of January when after previous years of 52, 62, 64 and 68 he was desperate for a 69 but failed yet again. After many hours in the field since, he is miles ahead of everyone else and the chuckling hasn't stopped. But we all know it will not last.

Cumbria Breeding Results

[source:RSPB]

Geltsdale Reserve, Cumbria has had an excellent breeding season with some large broods being noted by the new warden.

Suing Professor Pochard ... Never

Doctor Gadwall received the following email today -

Who is this impostor you refer to as Professor Pochard? You should know that I have the copyright on this particular nom-de-feather and you will be hearing from my solicitor. Alternatively we could settle out of court by you agreeing to transport your cosy little Clara Vale hide to Whitburn where it will be sited on the mound behind the Shearwater Estate facing inland to mop up any passing Leach's which decide to try to sneak by via the back door.
Nice to see that there have been Waxwings about; your lads will have been able to brush up on their i.d. techniques.

(The original) Professor Pochard

Doctor Gadwall has replied with the following statement :

Dear Sir,
Professor Pochard is a duck-loving fellow of considerable age who has recently learnt how to use two fingers (on the computer). He would be deeply hurt if I suggested that some young whipper-snapper from the birding deserts of Whitburn claims to have copyright on his name. After a lifetime of studying ducks armed only with a large tanker-sized flask of coffee and chocolate biscuits I think he is entitled to keep his name. A Google search for 'Professor Pochard' only brings that fine website called Gateshead Birders . So I believe your claim is fraudulent young man.

Whitburn .... Fraudulent claims ... Where have I heard that before :-)

The mystical hide of Clara will of course not be moving despite the feeling you are in the Tardus once inside that wonderfull warm wooden structure. Sea-watching in comfort at Whitburn would not seem right . So its in everyone's interest that sea-watching continues in the old metal and brick outside loo-lookalike dwelling. I sure you understand.

If only we could see the Waxwings we might be able to brush up on our technique!!

Doctor Gadwall

WARDEN CHESS END OF YEAR REPORT

Well since the last update a lot has happened! The white queen has gone off to join the king, the black queen has just gone, after complaining she hadn't been taken, pawns and knights have disappeared too. Not the black bishop though he is still on the board very eager to see the new pieces which are coming after Christmas!

Many of the other pieces have gone back to their original squares so that a brand new game can start .

The Grand Master has overseen all these comings and goings but has decreed that the game can't commence until New Year, at the moment he's too busy singing his favourite carol, 'I'm dreaming.................. '